WHY HAPPINESS IS OVER-RATED

Do you think being happy is the key to success? I don't. Happiness may be the key to a healthy heart and a lot of other things but it sure isn't the best motivator. People rarely work hard because they are happy. When you're happy, you want to enjoy life, you wish to behold the world and admire the wonders of nature, you want to spend that time in merriment with your loved ones and goofing around with your friends. You want to RELAX because that's what Frankie says and you always listen to Frankie when you're happy. Don't you? How about when you're miserable and desperate? Not what anybody voluntarily wants to be but perhaps it's not the worst thing to be. It's only when you're miserable in your present that you work hard to prevent the same from happening in your future. Desperation is an excellent source of motivation. In the end it's all a question of who is the most desperate to win. A miserable man doesn't have the time or the mood to sit back and enjoy life. However, there's a difference between being miserable and desperate and being miserable and depressed. depression doesn't do any good. None that Iv'e seen. Let's discuss another thing that motivates us - jealousy. Believe it or not, wanting to do better than those we envy is a very vital source of motivation for a lot of people. In good spirit it's called being competitive. Competition is more about aggression and adrenaline than it is about happiness and joy. Now let's come to my favourite - revenge. The sharpest of all. It doesn't burn out as quickly as others and failure and obstacles only increase this one. Only way it ends is when you either get it or forgive and forget it which isn't easy to do unless of course you're just too lazy to even care. It's only lazy people who believe in this kind of crazy behaviour of forgive and forget. Men who mean business rarely forgive and never forget. So basically what I'm trying to say is that maybe not being happy all the time isn't the worst thing in the world. In fact it can be ind of neat to let's say being 10% happy and 90% motivated(by any of the reasons above). That's what I'd go for. Let me know if you think differently.

WHAT’S WORSE?

What’s worse?
a) Working really hard and achieving something that you in the end feel wasn’t really worth the effort but in fact a bit of a waste of time,
OR
b) Giving up on something that you’d really like to do just because it’s difficult (or because you’re not sure whether it will be worth the effort) and then wondering what it would have been like if you hadn’t given up?

None of the above two is an ideal situation to be in. An ideal situation to be in would be to have worked really hard and achieved your target and then finding it to be every bit worth the effort!! However, as is the case with all things ideal, this situation too is extremely rare. So what most of us usually find ourselves in is one of the non-ideal situations mentioned above. Which one would you choose to be in?

It’s hard to be motivated about something unless you know it is sure to work well for you. Difficulty usually decreases your chances of success and that’s why giving up seems like a very easy choice. However, that’s not what I’m concerned with here. Assuming that you are going to be successful at a supposedly difficult task, if you are not sure whether the success would ‘mean that much to you’, it’s kind of difficult to find the motivation to go for it. You can’t expect to ‘gain’ a lot in such cases. However there might be another reason to do it. THE CHALLENGE. If it’s not easy, it’s usually interesting. Even if it’s not interesting, you feel good about yourself when you accomplish such a feat. If it gives you nothing else, it gives you confidence.

Let’s not forget the other side of the coin. Sometimes, it may so happen, that you might fail ( i know it’s crazy but let’s keep our intent of all positivity aside for a moment and consider the possibility). You’re failing, at a task you weren’t even sure of going for in the first place. That is bound to feel like an awful waste of time and energy. Would you be willing to incur that cost?

Now let’s consider the first option. Giving up because the idea may or may not work for you. Well there’s only one way to find out! If you give up,
a) you might save yourself some precious time which you can use to amuse yourself
b) you might be saving yourself from frustration and bitter disappointment of failure
At the same time,
c) you miss out on an opportunity to succeed in endeavour
d) you will be missing a chance to learn and gain some valuable experience
e) you will definitely find yourself wondering what might have happened if you had gone for it.

If you ask me, I can live knowing that I missed a chance to succeed, I can also get over having missed a chance to learn but I can never stop wondering what might have happened if I had just tried. It’s just too big a price to pay. Moreover do you really expect to be always sure of success? Do you always expect life to give you exactly the chance you need? That almost never happens. How do people become successful? They take the chances they get and try to make the most of them. Sometimes their effort pays off, sometimes it doesn’t. What makes the difference is the fact that those people realised that sometimes the result doesn’t measure up to the effort but that’s no reason to stop trying.

HAVING A HEALTHY DISREGARD FOR THE IMPOSSIBLE.

Best words I've read in a very long time. How many times have I dipensed off good ideas just because they were difficult to carry through? A lot apparantly ! This is something that I'd like to change about myself. I was reading a book called "the Google Story" and that's where I read these words. For now let's delve into this idea of having a healthy disregard for the impossible.
I think it's very fulfilling to do something original. It does not have to be significant, it just has to be. Something that other's did not do or think about doing. And to do such a thing is usually not a walkover. You're talking of a path untreaded mind you!! There are going to be problems, many of them and they would come in unforeseen variety. Solutions to some of them would be straightforward and simple, some would be tricky requiring a pang of ingenuity, some would simply be cumbersome requiring a lot of hardwork and time. Sometimes there are no shortcuts. Now when you see a problem you're going to face in an idea that appeals to you, you can either reject the idea as chimerical or you can look for a solution. There always is a way, you just have to be determined to find it.
Another important thing that i'd like to mention is how much we tend to compromise on our goals just for comfort. There are sometimes several ways. The difficult ways sometimes result in better results but we tend to settle for easier ways and inferior results (or is it just me?). I've started to despise this attitude. Compromises should never be made to make things easier. They should be seen as a last resort only when there are no other choices (and believe me if you are willing to find one, you will have a choice). The more you compromise, the lesser your chances to excel.
For really seeing all the possibilities that are out there, having a disregard for the impossible is of paramount importance. After all, our knowledge is only limited. It has boundaries, but there are no boundaries to vision. If we are able to protect our vision from the "common sense" that knowledge imparts to us, we can really make wonders happen. Instead of trying to think "What can be?", we should be thinking about "What should be?". Whether it's possible or not will be decided only after we have tried and failed and tried again and again. I can't help but remember this song from TZP-

Dekho Dekho Kya Woh Ped Hai
Chadar Ode Ya Khada Koi
Dekho Dekho Kya Woh Ped Hai
Chadar Ode Ya Khada Koi
Baarish Hai Ya Aasmaan Ne
Chod Diye Hai Nal Khule Kahin

Hum Jaise Dekhe Yeh Jahaan Hai Waisa Hi
Jaisi Nazar Apni

Khul Ke Sochein Aao
Pankh Zara Phailaao
Rang Naye Bikhrao
Chalo Chalo Chalo Chalo
Naye Khwaab Bun Le

This is exactly what i'm trying to say here. I've just realised this and hopefully will act upon it and I hope you will too!

BROKEN

Something's broken, shattered into pieces,
Something's gone far far away,
Something's lost much to my dismay,
It just wasn't mine whatever my heart says.

Dear to my heart, very precious it was,
very meaningful, very intense and defining.
I took me vigourously.......completely......... absolutely.
I drowned myself not resenting for a moment,
never even thinking that possibly it might end.
And end it did, faded, vanished...... leaving me famished.

It amazes me how meaningful it was, how exhilirating, how powerful!
It's a pity it just wasn't meant to be.
It's just gone, broken, shattered into pieces.

The times with Bobbin.

This one's to Shikhar Chaudhary. First of all HAPPY BUDDAY BOBBIN! I've had some crazy memories with him during the time we used to go to Kanpur Road for NTSE preparations. People who think I'm crazy should meet him. Okay where do I begin? Well, during that time, we co-invented the concept of swarg. It's what we used to call the washrooms because let's face it when you're really under pressure, it does feel like heaven. Then there were the classes that we bunked. Actually now that I think about it, we rarely stayed after lunch there. Ever tried samosas at Alambagh chauraha? They are quite good and used to be a stapled diet for us. We also used to play football with a duster. Another thing that I'll never forget is the transport that we used. The stinkiest, smelliest of the small buses that run in lucknow. It cost Rs 2/- I believe after the student concession and we were so proud to have struck a cheap deal but believe me, any person could easily choke in those vehicles.
Then there's another crazy story about the time we walked from Kanpur road to rajajipuram. A 2 hour walk in mid may with sun blazing at it's fullest absolutely for no reason. We sneaked out of one the classes and out of the school. It was a really hot day and I suggest that we should probably walk. No other person I know would ever have said yes to that. It really was hot and it made no sense to do it but we did. On our way we had our usual samosas, kheera, barf-gola(that was awesome). We also saw some pretty weird stuff which I'm not going to mention here and we finally made it to RJPM and that is the story of my favourite time with Shikhar Chaudhary.

what makes life interesting?

I don't know what it is? This emptiness that engulfs me every now and then. What's the reason? Something's not right. It get's so lonely and meaningless. WILL or the lack of it, makes all the difference. Do I miss somethings that have changed? Maybe I do. But isn't change inevitable? Isn't the world around us changing continuously every living moment. The world this moment is different from the world a moment ago. And that world that existed a moment ago is not coming back again. Never. So even if we try to cling on to the past, all that we really are doing is making ourselves obsolete and miserable. We are refusing to change while the world around us does. We are refusing to do anything new. Past, no matter how wonderful and glorious or how difficult and unfortunate it was, has after all passed. It's over but Why does it become so difficult to understand sometimes? Why can't we just LET IT GO?
It's not a continuous state of mind either. Now you'd think you're done with it and next day you're still thinking the same things. The "things" that made an impact. The things that "mattered". Well there are a lot of things that matter now. Why do we tend to ignore them at the cost of something that we can't change, something that doesn't even matter now? Life is interesting as long as things are "happening". Seriously, it's very important to have good times as well as bad times. It's the "dull" times that I find the scariest. I'd rather be "miserable but involved" rather than "bored and distracted". When you work really hard for something and you get it, a lot of times, it's nothing like you imagined it. Same thing happens after difficult times are over. We don't feel that so called elusive "happiness" we have been looking for. In fact, it gets rather melancholy and sour.
The fact is that we never really want those important times to end. The satisfaction doesn't lie in getting what we want. It lies in "trying our best" to achieve our goals. The time that we spend fighting trying to survive are way better than the times that come afterwards. It's not about what we "get", it's about what we "do". Life is all about "doing" because by doing something we are changing with the world, evolving. The struggle, the fight keeps us alive. There is no end to problems which is actually a good thing. We have to keep proving ourselves again and again. That's life!