SATYAMEV SATYAMEV SATYAMEV JAYATE!!!

I've always liked Aamir Khan. He doesn't disappoint! Definitely not in Satyamev Jayate. I'm not a big fan of reality shows and talk shows game shows and all the other kind of shows which continue to flood and plague the idiot box (not anymore at least and to be honest I've never really seen much of them). Satyamev Jayate I liked. Female Foeticide is a serious issue and that's how it was portrayed-with seriousness and rather clinically.

There were some horrifying tales of cruelty and incredulity. A woman, a doctor by profession, a wife of a surgeon, and daughter-in-law of a Professor and a retired vice-principal, saw one of her twin young infant daughters kicked down the stairs by her own mother-in-law. Another had several of her daughters aborted by her in-laws. Another had her face mutilated for the same reason. Makes you think! We're not as civilized as we believe. We're still capable of performing appalling, horrifying and barbaric acts. Only thing we've learned is discrimination.

It's important for some people to further their name. So that even though they will be gone from the world, their name will live on. Well, newsflash people! Nobody cares about your 'name' and your lineage. What you are remembered for are your actions. If I wanted to be remembered forever, I'd write a book ( a good one that a lot of people like ). At some point in time, in my life, I felt prejudiced against the whole concept of last names. It just didn't feel right. I mean I just couldn't ask people their full name. Nor was I comfortable telling my own. It felt wrong. As I grew up, of course, I became more comfortable with the idea. This problem would not be there in a world without last names ( One of my ultimate fantasies ). We're not defined by the names of our fathers. Are we? It's what they teach us, the values that we learn from them that matter. So, ...........aaaa MURDERERS,..... don't,... please don't try to father a son after killing your daughter! For all I know, you don't deserve to 'further your name' ( doesn't bring much glory to your sons ).

All in all, I'm glad that we're getting something meaningful on television. It aired simultaneously on DD1( which i grew up watching) and star plus, a first in the history of indian television. Well done, Aamir!! Congratulations on fully and correctly utilizing the power of television.Once again you didn't disappoint.

FAITH

A wise man once said- “There is no black or white, just shades of gray”. What is good and bad, right and wrong? How do you decide that? Answer- You have your own beliefs. You can never exactly ‘know’, you can only believe. Nobody has seen God, nobody ‘knows’ that God exists. Yet millions believe. In a way it sounds ridiculous- ‘millions believing religiously in an entity whose very existence can never be proved’. Not exactly being objective. Are we?

How do you really get to a person. I mean what really makes a man angry? Well there can be countless answers to that but is there a common denominator for most of those cases? I believe there is. You challenge a man’s belief system and he will come for you with all he has got. It just can’t be tolerated. No one likes to be told what to believe. It is something that comes from within and it has to. Only then will you fight for it. If you believe in something because others tell you to or because others do the same, you are making the biggest compromise you can possibly make. Everything else can be compromised but not your beliefs. It’s the biggest price a man can pay. Let’s see how.

Suppose you’re saying that you believe in something just because it seems to be the ‘popular opinion’. Now you know that thing they say about opinions- ‘Opinions are like underwear, they have to be changed everyday or else they start to stink’( Actually I have tweaked this one a little :) ).  Next day, ‘the’ opinion changes and you look like a fool- not to others, but to yourself. No one else would even care to remember what you were saying yesterday but you would. However when it won’t fit the ‘status quo’, you will start doubting yourself. Bazinga!!. You’re screwed. Your whole belief system is gone and so is a bit of your self-respect. Ouch. Why did this happen? It happened because you weren’t true to yourself, because you wanted to look good instead of being good.

Here’s another question that’s bothering me. If there is really no way of knowing whether what you believe in is actually true or not, isn’t it foolish to stick to it instead of saying- “I’m not really sure, I might be wrong.” No it’s not. It most definitely is not. For you to believe in something, it doesn’t even have to be ‘true’. Just your faith has to be absolute, for your own freedom and self-respect. If you believe in something, do it emphatically and stand up for it. Now won’t it result in conflicts? People can believe in different things and be equally sure about them. Yes. there will be a lot more conflicts if you start standing up for what you believe in. Is it that bad? Clearly not. On the other hand, trying to change your beliefs just to avoid conflicts sounds kind of pathetic.

The Good thing about being Good.

WHAT is a good deed? An act of charity? Yes, very much! Helping a total stranger in any small way? Well, that too. What else? Okay, clearly it's impossible to make an exhaustive list of all the good acts possible. So how can we answer the question- What is a good deed?

In a nutshell, I'd say a good deed is an act that-

~ brings joy and satisfaction to you,

~ more often than not brings joy to those around you and

~ is never accompanied by guilt.

Recently, I went on a pilgrimage to Iran, Iraq and Syria. My whole family was there alongside a hundred odd other people. We had to spend eight long hours at Tehran airport on our way back. I took my wheelchair-ridden grandmother to show around the place. I took her to a cafe to eat. It offered lemon tarts, chocolate cakes, sandwiches and many other delectable delights. There was a guy sitting there who was watching me trying to explain to my confused grandma the apparently weird delicacies that the place offered. He probably was an employee of the cafe itself. Perceiving that she wasn't quite comfortable with any of the dishes, he gave us his own lunch-pack without taking so much as a penny. I don't speak any Persian but I think he asked my grandmother to remember him in her prayers. It was an act of generosity that I'll never forget. Also, everyone else present at the place was clearly touched by the gesture. It brought smiles all around. I really relished that meal. Yes, it gave me joy!

  

Why should I do good? Simply because it delights me! Every time I do something good, my conscience becomes a tad clearer and my perception of myself improves. A question arises- "If we do good only to make ourselves look better, is it against the ‘good’ spirit?". It depends on whether you're trying to improve your perception of yourself or to please others. No matter what you do, you can not please everyone. However, it's very satisfying if you do it just for yourself. Only then can you truly enjoy it. Moreover, we are all responsible for our own happiness. I cannot possibly think of a better way to find happiness and satisfaction in life. A good deed is therefore, it's own reward.

“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give,”  said Winston Churchill. We all look to make a difference in this world. To start with, we can help those around us in whatever small way we can. In the process, we do a lot more good to ourselves, and the one person in the world most affected by your charity will be yourself!

WHY HAPPINESS IS OVER-RATED

Do you think being happy is the key to success? I don't. Happiness may be the key to a healthy heart and a lot of other things but it sure isn't the best motivator. People rarely work hard because they are happy. When you're happy, you want to enjoy life, you wish to behold the world and admire the wonders of nature, you want to spend that time in merriment with your loved ones and goofing around with your friends. You want to RELAX because that's what Frankie says and you always listen to Frankie when you're happy. Don't you? How about when you're miserable and desperate? Not what anybody voluntarily wants to be but perhaps it's not the worst thing to be. It's only when you're miserable in your present that you work hard to prevent the same from happening in your future. Desperation is an excellent source of motivation. In the end it's all a question of who is the most desperate to win. A miserable man doesn't have the time or the mood to sit back and enjoy life. However, there's a difference between being miserable and desperate and being miserable and depressed. depression doesn't do any good. None that Iv'e seen. Let's discuss another thing that motivates us - jealousy. Believe it or not, wanting to do better than those we envy is a very vital source of motivation for a lot of people. In good spirit it's called being competitive. Competition is more about aggression and adrenaline than it is about happiness and joy. Now let's come to my favourite - revenge. The sharpest of all. It doesn't burn out as quickly as others and failure and obstacles only increase this one. Only way it ends is when you either get it or forgive and forget it which isn't easy to do unless of course you're just too lazy to even care. It's only lazy people who believe in this kind of crazy behaviour of forgive and forget. Men who mean business rarely forgive and never forget. So basically what I'm trying to say is that maybe not being happy all the time isn't the worst thing in the world. In fact it can be ind of neat to let's say being 10% happy and 90% motivated(by any of the reasons above). That's what I'd go for. Let me know if you think differently.

WHAT’S WORSE?

What’s worse?
a) Working really hard and achieving something that you in the end feel wasn’t really worth the effort but in fact a bit of a waste of time,
OR
b) Giving up on something that you’d really like to do just because it’s difficult (or because you’re not sure whether it will be worth the effort) and then wondering what it would have been like if you hadn’t given up?

None of the above two is an ideal situation to be in. An ideal situation to be in would be to have worked really hard and achieved your target and then finding it to be every bit worth the effort!! However, as is the case with all things ideal, this situation too is extremely rare. So what most of us usually find ourselves in is one of the non-ideal situations mentioned above. Which one would you choose to be in?

It’s hard to be motivated about something unless you know it is sure to work well for you. Difficulty usually decreases your chances of success and that’s why giving up seems like a very easy choice. However, that’s not what I’m concerned with here. Assuming that you are going to be successful at a supposedly difficult task, if you are not sure whether the success would ‘mean that much to you’, it’s kind of difficult to find the motivation to go for it. You can’t expect to ‘gain’ a lot in such cases. However there might be another reason to do it. THE CHALLENGE. If it’s not easy, it’s usually interesting. Even if it’s not interesting, you feel good about yourself when you accomplish such a feat. If it gives you nothing else, it gives you confidence.

Let’s not forget the other side of the coin. Sometimes, it may so happen, that you might fail ( i know it’s crazy but let’s keep our intent of all positivity aside for a moment and consider the possibility). You’re failing, at a task you weren’t even sure of going for in the first place. That is bound to feel like an awful waste of time and energy. Would you be willing to incur that cost?

Now let’s consider the first option. Giving up because the idea may or may not work for you. Well there’s only one way to find out! If you give up,
a) you might save yourself some precious time which you can use to amuse yourself
b) you might be saving yourself from frustration and bitter disappointment of failure
At the same time,
c) you miss out on an opportunity to succeed in endeavour
d) you will be missing a chance to learn and gain some valuable experience
e) you will definitely find yourself wondering what might have happened if you had gone for it.

If you ask me, I can live knowing that I missed a chance to succeed, I can also get over having missed a chance to learn but I can never stop wondering what might have happened if I had just tried. It’s just too big a price to pay. Moreover do you really expect to be always sure of success? Do you always expect life to give you exactly the chance you need? That almost never happens. How do people become successful? They take the chances they get and try to make the most of them. Sometimes their effort pays off, sometimes it doesn’t. What makes the difference is the fact that those people realised that sometimes the result doesn’t measure up to the effort but that’s no reason to stop trying.

HAVING A HEALTHY DISREGARD FOR THE IMPOSSIBLE.

Best words I've read in a very long time. How many times have I dipensed off good ideas just because they were difficult to carry through? A lot apparantly ! This is something that I'd like to change about myself. I was reading a book called "the Google Story" and that's where I read these words. For now let's delve into this idea of having a healthy disregard for the impossible.
I think it's very fulfilling to do something original. It does not have to be significant, it just has to be. Something that other's did not do or think about doing. And to do such a thing is usually not a walkover. You're talking of a path untreaded mind you!! There are going to be problems, many of them and they would come in unforeseen variety. Solutions to some of them would be straightforward and simple, some would be tricky requiring a pang of ingenuity, some would simply be cumbersome requiring a lot of hardwork and time. Sometimes there are no shortcuts. Now when you see a problem you're going to face in an idea that appeals to you, you can either reject the idea as chimerical or you can look for a solution. There always is a way, you just have to be determined to find it.
Another important thing that i'd like to mention is how much we tend to compromise on our goals just for comfort. There are sometimes several ways. The difficult ways sometimes result in better results but we tend to settle for easier ways and inferior results (or is it just me?). I've started to despise this attitude. Compromises should never be made to make things easier. They should be seen as a last resort only when there are no other choices (and believe me if you are willing to find one, you will have a choice). The more you compromise, the lesser your chances to excel.
For really seeing all the possibilities that are out there, having a disregard for the impossible is of paramount importance. After all, our knowledge is only limited. It has boundaries, but there are no boundaries to vision. If we are able to protect our vision from the "common sense" that knowledge imparts to us, we can really make wonders happen. Instead of trying to think "What can be?", we should be thinking about "What should be?". Whether it's possible or not will be decided only after we have tried and failed and tried again and again. I can't help but remember this song from TZP-

Dekho Dekho Kya Woh Ped Hai
Chadar Ode Ya Khada Koi
Dekho Dekho Kya Woh Ped Hai
Chadar Ode Ya Khada Koi
Baarish Hai Ya Aasmaan Ne
Chod Diye Hai Nal Khule Kahin

Hum Jaise Dekhe Yeh Jahaan Hai Waisa Hi
Jaisi Nazar Apni

Khul Ke Sochein Aao
Pankh Zara Phailaao
Rang Naye Bikhrao
Chalo Chalo Chalo Chalo
Naye Khwaab Bun Le

This is exactly what i'm trying to say here. I've just realised this and hopefully will act upon it and I hope you will too!

BROKEN

Something's broken, shattered into pieces,
Something's gone far far away,
Something's lost much to my dismay,
It just wasn't mine whatever my heart says.

Dear to my heart, very precious it was,
very meaningful, very intense and defining.
I took me vigourously.......completely......... absolutely.
I drowned myself not resenting for a moment,
never even thinking that possibly it might end.
And end it did, faded, vanished...... leaving me famished.

It amazes me how meaningful it was, how exhilirating, how powerful!
It's a pity it just wasn't meant to be.
It's just gone, broken, shattered into pieces.